Tainted Love
by SleepyShuffle
Summary: Set during events of Final Fantasy XIII-2, SPOILERS INSIDE. NoelxCaius. Noel has given himself solely to Caius and can't understand why Caius won't do the same. Instead Caius is cold and distant, but this never stops Noel from letting him back into his life and letting Caius mess with his heart, time and time again. (Bad summary: BETTER THAN IT SOUNDS, rated M to be safe)
1. Chapter I: Cold Front

**A.N.: **Wrote this while listening to Cold Front by Laura Welsh, it's a good track to listen to while reading this chapter too

* * *

~Chapter I: Cold Front~  


Noel loved him, with all his heart. No matter that the world was on its last legs and everything around them was dead or dying, Noel refused to let go of the one thing which gave him a meaning in this bland and empty landscape.

The barren wasteland of sands they lived in, so lifeless and vast, served as a constant reminder of the inevitable death they were all forced to face. As his friends and family faded and withered away around him from disease or starvation, the last tribe of Gran Pulse was reduced to less than twenty stragglers who were unlucky enough to survive into the depressing future, where the only thing to do was await your own death.

So of course Noel clung to him, he was the only hope he had of still feeling alive, even though he knew Caius never returned these feelings, he was thankful enough Caius offered himself up to Noels comfort.

The two had been close throughout their gloomy childhood, brought together and bonding over the protection of the young and beautiful Yuel. Sometimes Noel would feel jealous when Caius poured and lavished attention on her, while he would always watch on in the background. Always feeling like the third wheel until Caius would come searching for him, come straight into his room without a word and crush his lips against Noels, knowing he would be instantly accepted and forgiven. Noels arms would always wrap around him as Caius pinned him to his bed, carnal desire taking over him as time and time again he would bite at Noels neck, marking him as his own. Noel did nothing to stop him, he let Caius do as he pleased, he gave himself fully to him, his body was his, to do with as he pleased.

How could Noel not? How could he not when Caius was the only person he had left…

After he was finished, Caius was always silent and never spoke a word to Noel, no matter how vocal he was during their sex. He would sit on the side of the bed, his back facing Noel for a brief pause before standing to dress himself. Before leaving Noel, sweat sticking his brown hair to his forehead, struggling to catch his breath as his naked body was left alone, lying on the single bed, purple-red marks glowing on his neck.

Each time he watched the other man leave, he felt a spike crashing through his heart, another little pin poking him in the chest every time, another reminder that Caius didn't love him, another pain reminding him Caius didn't care, each time those black boots crossed the floor and left him.

But he wouldn't cry, the brunette would always pull the blanket over his head and wait for sleep to claim his tired aching frame. There was no need for tears in this world, who would see them fall? Who would comfort you? Everyone was going through exactly the same thing alone.

Except Noel wasn't alone, Noel had Caius.

One day after another of Caius' visits to his room, after a day of tough hunting under the heat of the dessert, Caius stood from the bed and began to put on his clothes.

Noels eyes slowly traced over his finely toned figure, eyes not mapping out his body, merely remembering it from many other times, many other encounters…all of which ended the same way.

Caius was pulling on his undershirt when he felt himself being watched. He frowned slightly and turned to see Noel was sat up on the bed, his brown eyes locking with Caius's purple ones.

Noels words cut through the silent air between them,

"Why do you always leave me?"

he asks and the other mans frown deepens.

"Because I have to"

He replies coolly and returns to redressing his half-naked body.

Noel is silent once again, his eyes staring off vacantly as he processes Caius' reply. It doesn't make any sense to him, Caius knows Noel would give him anything, even the moon if he asked for it. Things that were impossible, Noel would still try to please him. Caius had no reason to leave him…other than…

"You don't love me" Noel snapped suddenly, his teeth clenching and a frown gracing his face as he stared at the other mans back, gripping the bedsheets in his fists. Caius didn't pause in dressing himself, even at this personal accusation. Noel felt himself gripping the bedsheets tighter, his hands beginning to sweat as his glare intensified on Caius' back. He didn't care how desperate he sounded, everybody in this god forsaken future needed another to rely on.

'Why won't he answer me?' His confused rage in his head making his brain feel like it was beating like his heart was pounding in his chest as Caius continued dressing himself as he always did, as if Noel wasn't in the room, as if he hadn't a care in the world about how much the younger brunette sought his affections.

Noel dared not speak another word, hoping Caius would be overcome by guilt and apologise, or at least reassure him. But the silence dragged on, the only noises being the wind as it rattled the metal sheet currently being used as a roof over Noels bed and the noise of Caius' boots being fastened.

Once Caius was dressed he turned and faced Noel, who glared back up at his elder, rage burning in his brown eyes. Caius looked blankly to the young brunette who bore his love bite on his collar bone. Caius's eyes absently traced over the mark as he spoke,

"You aren't supposed to love me" his graceful voice filled the room, a hint of sadness detected in his voice, before he looked up from Noels red bite and into his eyes, only meeting them for a second before turning and swiftly exiting the room. Leaving Noel all alone with the rattling of his roof and the howling of the desert winds.

* * *

**A.N.: **Gonna try keep this brief; review please, I might release the next chapter faster xD If not, the next update will be in 4 days because I went mad and wrote this entire story in one sitting o.o Although to be fair, they are short chapters. Well hope you like it so far! I just wanted to write Noel x Caius for some reason, mainly because they're isn't enough of it out there and I wanted to put my version out there xD...also about the M rating, there is no explicit smut xD I just wanted to play it safe! Also I know Noel is meant to have Yuel as a friend too but, a) I dislike her and b) she's too young and busy being seeress xD


	2. Chapter II: Falling

**A.N.: **Written listening to Falling by Florence & The Machine and again, I reccomend listening to it while reading c:

* * *

~Chapter II: Falling~

For all the years he'd know him, he'd never completely understood Caius. To say he was his best and closest friend, other than Yuel who was at least half his age, he could rarely predict what was going on inside the lilac-haired mans head.

For weeks he didn't understand what Caius had meant;

_"You aren't supposed to love me"_

Noel thought about it long and hard, and yet he could come up with nothing. Caius' visits had stopped ever since that day he had been bold and foolish enough to question him and Noel barely ever caught a glimpse of the other man, never mind have a conversation with him. Part of Noel regretted questioning Caius because he was seemingly being punished for it, while the other part was just felt hurt from the familiar taste of rejection.

In a stubborn effort to ignore the Caius shaped hole in his daily life, Noel concentrated on hunting solo, trying to master the massive two-handed sword he had made based on the model the Guardian used*. He tried to drown out the confusion and heartache, by improving his hunting technique. This was the logical thing to do since Noels daily life consisted of milling around the dying ruins they called a town. Such a depressing atmosphere just begged bad feelings to cloud his mind, hunting was the healthiest option. Although time and time again he would find his movements were too slow to be effective, his steps too heavy and not as nearly as graceful as Caius. He could wield this sword, but over time he grew frustrated at his ineffectiveness.

Yuel watched as Noel desperately fought against an alpha uridimmu, the rare species that had somehow survived until the ends of time. She watched his steps, noted how they were out of time and out of sync with the swings of his sword. She shook her head, but did not leave the desert, instead waiting for Noel, the wind blowing sand around her feet in the mid-day sun.

Eventually the wolf fell and Noel sheathed the great sword on his back, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his arm before stretching his back and walking over to the fallen creature, pulling out his carving knife, which had been a gift from Caius. As the knife glinted in the sun, absently Noel rolled it in his hands, the reflection in the knifes blade changing as it spun in his palm. Noel blinked as the reflection in the knife changed and he whirled round, surprised to see Yuel standing over him, the pensive look she wore making her look much older than her years on Pulse.

Before Noel could ask how she got so far out into the desert by herself, Yuel was speaking,

"You won't beat him with that sword"

She said, her quiet voice melting away almost instantly into the wind. Noel frowned and looked to the knife in his hand, before realising she meant the sword on his back. He looked over his shoulder at the sheath before grabbing the hilt and pulling the sword out in front of him, looking up and down its massive iron frame.

"Caius is far more skilled with it than you are" she spoke again and at the mention of the Guardians name, Noel felt waves of anger, clenching his teeth and quickly slamming the great sword into the desert sand so it stood tall on a slant in between the two of them.

Noel looked at his hands in front of him, images and thoughts of Caius he'd tried so hard to push from his mind recently flooding back into his mind like a broken damn.

"Why would I fight Caius?" he growled, clenching his open palms into fists in front of him, while his eyebrows knotted together and his heart beat hard in his chest, as he spoke;

"He is my friend"

* * *

**A.N.:** Not much happened in this one I know...but it is necessary! However since next to nothing happens in it Imma update this again tomorrow at some point! ^-^ Hope you enjoy my take on this pairing! please, review if ya'll would like c:

*Noels great sword - I remember in the game it said he fights with two blades because he realised he wouldnt beat Caius with the great sword...I just wanted to put that in here...xD


	3. Chapter III: User Friendly

**A.N.: **Didn't write this fic listening to User Friendly (by Marilyn Manson), however the song is pretty good at describing their relationship from Caius' POV. I recommend listening to it, listen to the lyrics!

* * *

~Chapter III: User Friendly~

Yuel explained everything. She told Noel how Caius must fall at his blade if he is to succeed him and how Caius wouldn't take no for an answer. Noel was told to kill the man who was the only reason he found the strength to go on living for.

Backing down was not an option, unless he wanted to lose his life at the hands of the one he loved most.

Noel could take the rejection, he could take the seemingly emotionally detached ceremony Caius would call sex, he could even take the countless lies told by him. But he wouldn't allow the last thing he saw on Pulse to be the only man he had ever loved, pushing a blade through his heart and sending him to the world of the dead.

It was around this time Noel began to understand what Caius had meant; he shouldn't love him. The two had been chosen by the divine Etro to be the only ones capable of killing each other, by all rational thinking and natural instinct they should've been bitter enemies. Yet Caius was the one who knew this all along and he was the first to seek comfort in the other, knowing that it was wrong, knowing that if this boy fell in love with him, they were still going to have to kill each other. At this point Noel thought it was a cruel trick of Etro to deny them both happiness but eventually he swore to himself, he was not going to suffer the shame of losing to Caius. He now understood why he shouldn't love him, yet it didn't change the fact that he undoubtedly did.

He wasn't sure whether it was survival instincts or the fear of being killed by the man who held his unrequited love which made him train so vigorously with his newly crafted dual blades. They were his own creation and he was very proud of them, he vowed to train everyday until he was able to slay a behemoth on his own, only then would he accept he was ready to take on Caius himself.

As the weeks went by Noel could feel himself vastly improving, his attacks were becoming stronger and more deadly, his footwork accurate and decisive and his kills became quicker and more clean.

And still he saw no sign of Caius, it seemed the other man was still avoiding him. At first Noel thought he was to be rid of the other, but when he showed up in his room one night while he was drifting off to sleep and began placing gentle kisses on his lips, he felt shivers of excitement down his spine and the part of him he reserved for Caius became re-awakened with more force and vigour then ever, as always he found himself literally gripping onto Caius, with his arms, his hands in his hair, his legs round his waist, in order to feel alive.

And the same part of him was broken and shattered to pieces as always when Caius left, without so much as second glance.

Noel stared at his roof, the numb void growing in his chest, making him stay awake for hours on end until he felt his eyes becoming tired and weary. He knew Caius didn't care about him. He felt himself blinking and let out a silent yawn into the night as he tossed and turned trying to find a comfortable position to fall asleep in. He knew Caius didn't care and as much as Noel hated himself for admitting it, it would never stop Noel from loving him, Caius owned his heart and nothing would ever change that. As he shut his eyes and pulled his blankets closer to his body, which smelled like the man he cared for so much, he made himself another promise, he wouldn't kill Caius.

How could he?

* * *

**A.N.: **Ok so the next chapter is the last one...yes I know it's a really short fic...how else would I have written it in less than 12 hours? I'm going to update tomorrow with the final chapter c: Also, I will remind you readers about this in a note tomorrow but; before you read the next chapter read all 3 chapters again, its how they're meant to be read, one after another...so really I shouldn't have broken them up into updates oops. But they did need breaking up...I didn't like reading them one after another on the same page...Idk why.


	4. Chapter IV: It All Belongs To You

**A.N.: **ATTENTION! If you have just come to this chapter without reading the other 3 prior to this...read them all in order again! xD It's how I think my fic should be read. Also the song for this final chapter is It All Belongs To You by Fever Fever, again I recommend you listen to it c:

* * *

~Chapter IV: It All Belongs To You~

Noel had never been one to believe in the impossible, or time-travel for that matter. It also wasn't often that saving the universe crossed his mind. Yet he'd done it all, now only Caius stood in his way. He never would've fathomed this is what Caius had fabricated in the darkest part of his soul, never would've thought he resented his own curse so much he was willing to doom the entire future of mankind, even though he knew how it ended. Even though he knew the endless pain and suffering he was going to inflict upon everyone. Although the more Noel thought about it, it was a perfect comparison to what Caius had done to him too.

Needless to say over the course of time his opinion of Caius had changed, he was a selfish and cruel man and Noel knew he was a fool for loving him. But the strangest thing, even to himself was that he knew he couldn't kill him because that deepest and darkest secret he tried to hide, at some times even from himself, was that he still loved him.

* * *

The sickening sound of his blade piercing Caius' chest echoed in his ears and he heard Serah gasp in horror behind him. Noels world froze in that moment, everything seeming to move in slow motion as his eyes traced up to see Caius still doubled over on his sword.

Slowly, very slowly, Caius's head raised to lock eyes with his own brown ones. Noel could feel his mind and body trembling as he tried to comprehend what was happening wasn't just a cruel and twisted dream.

He saw Caius' lips twitch into a smile and suddenly he felt the blade plunge even deeper, with another horrifying squelch of the sword, its metal cutting through the flesh of the man in front of him. The noise running right through Noel as if a blade pierced his own heart, nausea flowing through his stomach, into his limbs making his knees shake and feel weak.

He could no longer see Caius' face but he felt his breath on his shoulder, it was slow and heavy, as he leant over the brunette,

"Please no" Noel found himself whispering softly, his voice breaking slightly as he felt bile rising in his throat and he begged tears not to fall. His lungs felt as if they were punctured as he took in shaky inhales of air. Of all the ways it could've ended Noel wouldn't have picked this one. He would never have picked this one.

He heard Caius let out a short breath of air and moisture slid through his fingers as he felt the mans blood running off the hilt of his sword and into his hand.

"Noel"

The voice in his ear tried to speak to him and Noel shut his eyes, he felt sick, he didn't want to hear it. He couldn't take the final rejection, the final declaration that Noel didn't mean anything to him. The last laugh at Noel for being such a fool to love him. He willed Caius to be silent, he wanted to sink to the floor, onto his knees and beg Caius not to say it.

"Noel I-"

A pause in breath and Noel felt tears welling up against his will in his eyes, his hands beginning to shake as more blood ran through them.

"I regret a lot of things I have done with my long life" Caius spoke softly while Noel just looked on straight ahead, his hazel eyes unfocussed on the seas of Valhalla,

"But you are not one of them"

In that moment Noel let out a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding as he felt Caius's nose and lips gently nuzzle his neck, before pausing next to his ear.

"My heart…will always belong…to you…"

Suddenly Noel felt Caius' hands on his gripping them tightly, rubbing his own blood across Noels knuckles as he tried to show Noel this last piece of affection, trying to take his shaking hands in his own, before his hands travelled up to the hilt of the sword which struck right through him.

With a guttural moan, Caius pulled the sword from his body and collapsed to his knees, clutching at his chest before he slowly fell forwards and hit the floor.

There was silence all around, there are no sounds and no noise in Valhalla, it is without time and space, where anything is possible; dreams or nightmares can all become reality.

Noel stood perfectly still, eyes still staring off into the horizon as his body, mind and soul felt vacant, covered in red and frozen in shock and horror. His blade still held in the air, the red liquid trickling down and hitting the sand, staining it crimson with the blood of the only man Noel had ever loved.

* * *

**A.N.: **Is it weird that I only realized how much of a broken and tragic relationship they have, after reading it through like the fourth time over? :x They never got to be together because Caius never counted on falling in love with Noel and he denied that he was in love to himself until near the very end, but by then it was too late. He was too focussed on protecting Yuel and thought he was above falling in love with a human (I use this term loosely, because although Caius is also human he has the Heart of Chaos and is immortal), he was too slow in realising he loved Noel.

Also, this provides an alternate ending to FFXIII-2, because as Caius promises his heart belongs to Noel, Noel therefore gains the Heart of Chaos and Etro doesn't die...allowing everyone (apart from Serah who dies, having seen too much of the timeline) to live happily ever after in 500AF! HURRAY~ xD

I like this pairing, I may or may not write some more for them...depends how much support this fic gets over the next month or so.

And well...that's a rough take on my view of their relationship folks x) HOPE YOU LIKED IT! PLEASE REVIEW, I'd love to know what you thought c:


End file.
